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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in the SRL writers' room are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of SRL Networks, its artists or its members. Anonymity allows our writers to express themselves freely without fear of persecution or harassment. This usually means things could sometimes get a little racy, raunchy, filthy, controversial, disgusting, annoying, cringe-worthy, explicit or uncomfortable but don't worry, we'll try to limit our curse words to two per paragraph and we promise not to use dirty words like poo-poo and wee-wee, or show you videos of Miley Cyrus shaking her bottom really fast. Also, the females here may say dirty things sometimes but they're totally not sluts - so don't stand too close behind them in the elevator or look at their boobies for too long, they carry pepper spray. If anything you read here offends you in any way please don't take it personally, but let us know so we can give whoever wrote it a good spanking, tickle them with a pink feather till it hurts when they smile and make them watch MTV for one whole hour.

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The World is Yours


MUSIC


HIP HOP REVIEWS


15-02-2025 01:41 GMT


Music Reviews (February 2025) - Discover the best emerging, underground & upcoming Hip Hop artists, bands & labels with reviews of the latest songs, albums & mixtapes, music videos, music playlists, live events/gigs, concerts/tours, & other entertainment from your favorite indie Hip Hop performers & entertainers daily on SRL Music Reviews.
Music by indie artist, Coolidge on Apple Music | Spotify


Coolidge

"Mill"
Hip Hop




My baby’s baby walked in the room late last night while I was doing my sexercise.

Wait wait wait, hold on. Let’s start again, that’s too strong. I know you weren’t expecting that… Let’s start over.

The title of this article is “The World is Yours”. If you are not familiar with the SRL Writers Room, that’s how we do things around here. There are two titles – one inside the page and one outside the page above the address bar. Sometimes they are both the same and other times they are different. If you don’t understand why, you will soon, hopefully.

Okay, let's start now.

When I walked into the office this morning there was total silence. I paused to look around and everyone immediately looked away and pretended they were working hard or looking for something. Some even started whistling for no reason and cleaning things that didn't look like they ever needed to be cleaned. As I walked along I heard whispers and some chuckles but thought nothing of it. It got even quieter. I put my head down and started to walk faster, wondering if they knew. I bumped into someone, or should I say something - well two actually, it was a pair. It was my boss, I bumped into her chest. Yes, she’s huge, with breasts so big they annoy me sometimes. She said to me furiously as she walked away: “hey, look where you’re going Mr. Bruce Willis. I thought to myself “Bruce Willis?”

As I continued to walk I heard someone in the distance say “hey look, it’s Bruce Bruce” and then they had a good laugh together. I stopped at my secretary’s desk to pick up letters and, with a big grin on her face she said: “Hey Donald”, and winked twice as she handed me my letters. I gasped deeply inside as I thought to myself: “they know”. I put my head down in shame, rushed into my office and closed all the blinds. I haven’t come out since.

It’s me “The Ideas Guy”, by the way. If you haven’t read my article “How to Turn Water to Wine” on SRL News, you’d better head over there after this, it’s going viral. [Here’s a link]

I know you’re wondering what all that name calling when I got into the office was about, so I’ll explain. Don’t worry, we’ll get down to the music review shortly. And I promise you, you’re gonna LOVE it.

Okay, so let me explain.

My baby’s baby walked in the room late last night while I was doing my sexercise. I was so furious because my cheeks were totally exposed and it wasn’t the good side. Apparently she had run out of milk and needed a refill. She stormed out madder than me, crying, yelling “mummy, you said I couldn’t do that anymore, why is HE doing it?”

I was so embarrassed because I’m lactose intolerant so I never do that, I don’t know what came over me. Later that night, I got up to have a little weewee but I couldn’t find a towel so I grabbed whatever I could find lying around, wrapped it around my waist and dashed to the bathroom. Just as I was about to start going, I heard loud footsteps coming down the hallway. Who could that be? Everyone was asleep. I tried to stop going but I had already started. I panicked as the footsteps drew closer and closer, louder and louder. I squeezed my bladder harder in a bid to finish quicker but it just kept coming. I looked backwards over my shoulder repeatedly as the footsteps drew closer, utterly terrified. Eventually it was too late. There was a huge thump and the door swung open. It was HER. And she was FURIOUS. I had finished so I quickly looked down to tuck my little buddy away. He's not little, that's just what I call him. I suddenly noticed that the pink warm fuzzy item of clothing I had picked up and tied around my waist wasn’t one of my girlfriend’s sweaters or lady things – it was her daughter’s favourite Donald Duck sweater. I knew I was in trouble. She charged at me waving her Barbie in the air like a crazy person that had just escaped from the asylum. I didn’t know what to make of it. She looked so scary and angry. I was still very tipsy so I panicked. I screamed like a little girl and covered my face with both palms in a defensive position. She stopped suddenly. Then she did the fiercest, most sinister and malicious thing anyone could ever do in that situation – she reached for her sweater... and then... she zipped it up really hard - all the way to the top. And then skipped away like a sissy with a bag of dicks. “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrghhhhh” I yelled out in agony as I looked down, terrified. My little buddy was hanging out helplessly, choking. It burned! So I screamed out “Aaaaaarrrrghhhh, it burns! It burns!”

My girlfriend woke up, the nanny came running. All the neighbours woke up and were banging on the door. Within minutes more than ten people had poured in as I lay on the bathroom floor helplessly, wearing nothing but a toddler’s really tiny Donald Duck sweater around my waste, with my little buddy hanging out for everyone to see as I struggled to cover it – the neighbours, the ambulance crew, two firemen for some reason, a police man, the guy at the concierge, the elevator operator, my girlfriend, and the nanny. We soon discovered that what we feared wasn’t actually the case. Yes, she had zipped the sweater all the way up to the top, but contrary to her evil intentions (which was what I had been reacting to), she had only managed to catch a few of hairs in the zipper, not my buddy - I was looking at it upside down. I had been so scared that I panicked and assumed the worst, and even felt the pain as if the worst had already happened. I felt so silly. Everyone laughed at me as the room emptied, shaking their heads as they left. My girlfriend thought it was so funny, and apparently she has told everybody. To cut a long story short, that was what led to the nicknames earlier on when I walked into the office. "Bruised Willis" (in reference to the actor Bruce Willis), "Bruce Bruised" (in reference to the comedian Bruce Bruce), Willie Wanker(in reference to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, insinuating that I might have been "spanking my monkey" when the incident occured), and Donald (because I was wearing a toddler’s Donald Duck sweater). I’m sure there are more coming so I’m bracing myself.

Phew! The whole thing has been weighing on me heavy all morning, I really needed to tell somebody. I’m so glad I did. Thanks for listening, I feel so much better now. Okay let’s get down to the music review that you and I both are here for. You’re gonna love this one I promise.

Drevo Coolidge, an up-and-coming independent hip-hop artist who needs no introduction, released his latest track, “Mill,” on February 14, 2025. Following in the footsteps of most of his previous releases, the track offers an exciting burst of energy that is guaranteed to hit the sweet spot of hip hop fans looking for something true and real. Boasting an exhilarating blend of groovy beats, empowered lyrics, and a sense of unrelenting drive, it has the potential to captivate listeners from all walks of life in ways only a few of the very best hip hop artists can. From the very first notes, it’s clear that "Mill" is all about pushing boundaries, making moves, and embracing the pursuit of wealth and success. The song's beat is vibrant, steady, and relentlessly catchy. It strikes that perfect balance between high-energy exhilaration and a smooth, rhythmic groove that hooks you immediately. But it’s not just about the beat; the musical composition also features a subtle yet commanding piano, which injects the track with a sophisticated flair. The piano doesn’t overwhelm the sound but rather complements the dynamic production, giving the song a nuanced layer that balances out the upbeat tempo. It feels innovative yet ever so familiar. Lyrically, “Mill” is a song for dreamers and hustlers alike. Coolidge is clearly no stranger to the grind, and his words echo the spirit of ambition that drives not just hip-hop artists, but anyone with their eyes on the prize.

Well what are you waiting for? Hit the play button already and share this with everyone you love.

Have an amazing day, and remember to always remember that the world is yours, and everything inside it.

Now go on out there and be somebody.



Explicit.

Oasis Reunion 2025: The Definitive Story of Their Return to the Stage and What It Means for Music Fans Worldwide

Oasis Reunion 2025: The Definitive Story of Their Return to the Stage and What It Means for Music Fans Worldwide

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 Oasis Reunion 2025: The Definitive Story of Their Return to the Stage and What It Means for Music Fans Worldwide

The Oasis reunion is officially happening, and the world of music is buzzing with excitement. For years, fans have been asking, are Oasis getting back together? The answer, as confirmed by both Liam Gallagher and Noel Gallagher, is a resounding yes. As Glastonbury 2025 approaches, speculation has turned into certainty: Oasis will headline the festival, marking their first performance together since their split in 2009.

The journey to this reunion has been anything but straightforward. Oasis was formed in 1991 in Manchester, quickly rising to fame with their debut album Definitely Maybe in 1994. This album, released under Creation Records, was a phenomenon, instantly making Oasis one of the biggest bands in the UK. With hits like "Supersonic" and "Live Forever," Oasis captured the angst and aspirations of a generation.


Euphoria


MUSIC


HIP HOP REVIEWS


18-05-2024 16:38 GMT


Music Reviews (May 2024) - Discover the best emerging, underground & upcoming Hip Hop artists, bands & labels with reviews of the latest songs, albums & mixtapes, music videos, music playlists, live events/gigs, concerts/tours, & other entertainment from your favorite indie Hip Hop performers & entertainers daily on SRL Music Reviews.
Music by indie artist, Chingy on YouTube | Spotify


Chingy

"Nu Beginnings"
Hip Hop


Euphoria

I walked in on my boss shooting ping-pong balls out of her lady garden this morning. It was really awkward but she was very aloof about the whole thing. She said: “Ah it’s you, come on in and take a seat”. I entered cautiously, still trying to process what I had just seen or if I had in fact seen what I had just seen. There were ping-pong balls everywhere, so many; so I knew I wasn’t seeing things – I had definitely seen what I saw. 

I generally don’t talk to other human beings because I’m way too intelligent for them to understand the words that are coming out of my mouth most of the time. Not all the time, but most of the time. 100% of the time I totally understand what they are saying but 50% of the time it’s sh*te and 50% of the other 50% of the time it makes absolutely no sense to me - I understand what they are saying, but it’s totally nuts to me. And I’m not anti-social, I promise. Like I said before, I’m just really intelligent. 

If you think that’s the most annoying and arrogant thing you’ve ever heard a person say, you’d better stop reading now. That’s not the most arrogant thing I’ve ever said. In fact, I don’t think it’s arrogant at all and I think it's a little arrogant of you to think it's arrogant. I haven't always been like this, I’m not the same person I was when I started out as a writer. I’ve grown a lot and become a much better person. It's all thanks to my boss, the same lady who was shooting ping-pong balls out of her ... err ... her ... love tunnel. 

You see, when I first started out I hated Everything and Everybody. It was a very general hate, not necessarily directed at anything or anyone specific - everything was just sh*t as far as I was concerned, and everyone sucked. I was really focused but people always wanted to talk – often about nothing. Before long everyone in the office was talking behind my back. 

My boss called me into her office one day. I went in and sat on the chair that had been prepared for me, opposite her desk. Right in front of me on the desk, there was a calendar and a jar of milk, carefully arranged so that it was the only thing I could see. She kept on typing on her computer and let me stare at them for a while. I could tell she wasn’t actually typing anything because she was peeking at me the whole time with her lips pressed together and her glasses hanging at the tip of her nose. She looked as though my presence disgusted her. 

After a few minutes, she stopped typing and took off her glasses. And started to explain what I was looking at.  She said: “You see… milk is good ... but after a few days it must go bad. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s good. People may suck sometimes, but it doesn’t change the fact that they’re still good people deep down inside, whether they know it or not.”

I’m lactose intolerant so that was a really bad analogy for me. Just last week I almost strangled my intern for bringing me a latte. But I totally got what she was saying nevertheless. 

She went on to explain: “If your life sucks, and I know it does, now that you hate everything; have you ever wondered what it might be like if you flipped your attitude over on its head and approached things with love instead of resentment?” 

I replied stubbornly: “that would be absolutely insane, why would I do that? I would do no such thing, just tell them all to leave me the f*ck alone and stop talking to me". 

She stood up and sighed; frustrated and impatient. She walked over and gestured repeatedly while saying “stand up”. I stood up. I had never really noticed how much taller than me she was until then. I was eye to eye with her… em... her ... emm … bazookas (that’s her breasts). It was really uncomfortable because I was standing really close and trying not to look at them but they were pointing right at me. They were so perky and big. I suddenly got a whiff of baby powder and cigarettes; so I knew I was standing way too close. I got scared, as if she might have detected that I’d just accidentally sniffed her … em… her ... em … her fun sacks (that’s her breasts too). I quickly started to take a step backwards so I could look up at her face. All of a sudden she grabbed the back of my head and shoved my face right into her cleavage. I struggled frantically, I wasn’t sure what was happening, but after a few seconds my heart stopped racing and I realized nothing bad was actually happening, in fact it was all good. I’ve had many fantasies but I’ve never ever imagined anything that awesome. I relaxed completely. I felt like a baby again. There was a rapid influx of pleasant feelings into my entire body – love, peace, contentment, forgiveness, joy, thanksgiving, and a sense of release. I was relaxed, more relaxed than I had ever been my whole life. I guess her job was done - she let me go and pushed me away, saying: “You’d better not have enjoyed that. Now get out, I need a fag (that’s a cigarette - not a man 😊)”. I’ve never hated anyone since. 

Fast forward 10 months; and I’m like Bruce Lee or Jackie Chan with a pen and a pad. I hit you with a left, hit you with a right, hit you with an uppercut and by the end of it all there’s so much bodily fluids in the air you’d think you were at a baby shower (that’s an orgy). Did you get it? Ladies getting showered with baby batter? I can’t believe I had to explain that. Okay buckle up now, we’ve got a long way to go; and I guarantee you I’ll make you squeeze that noodle of yours every step of the way. 

See, there were a lot of things going on in my life when I first started out as a writer, and I had absolutely no control over what was happening to me. Every day it was a different story, and it was always a surprise. I never saw it coming and I never could have anticipated it – it was almost like magic, but bad magic. It was almost as if nothing good could ever happen in my life. But at least now I had learned to love. At least I was no longer quick to blame this person or that person for this event or that event. That was a win bigger than I had known at the time. 

I went on to have several of such meetings with my boss, not just the one I mentioned. There were in fact 10. Each time she presented me with 2 items and at the end she had somehow taught me a lesson that changed my entire life for the better. Today was the 10th and final meeting, "the grand finale" as she called it. Hence, the ping-pong balls. But we'll talk about that a little bit later, or maybe in another article. And then you'll know why I was confident enough to say the arrogant things I said at the beginning of this article – so that you too can learn, and go on to say arrogant things to the people in your life, who you will no longer be able to engage in small talk with owing to your superior intelligence. 

The following month, I was staggering into the office early in the morning after a late night out with my two good friends Mary and Jack. My head was still spinning a little bit so I was hoping I could just sneak into my office and nobody would talk to me.

I started to tiptoe past my boss’s office when the door opened suddenly. She was wearing a really low cut yellow top. My mind flashed back to our last meeting and I got severely aroused IMMEDIATELY. But she looked really stern, like I had done something wrong again. She gestured with one finger and said “come here”. I followed her into the office. She shut the door really hard and said: “Sit down”. I sat. 

She said: “Your writing sucks balls ... It’s terrible”. 

I was hurt really bad because I literally thought I was at the top of my game at the time. 

She continued: “What’s the key to success?” 

I was still a little drunk so I scratched my head and just blurted out the first thing that came to my mind. I said: “Em, I don’t know? Eem, hard work?” 

She exclaimed: “Jesus Christ! I’ve hired another moron!! Moron!!!” 

She pointed at the items in front of me on the table, which I hadn’t noticed at the time, and said: “What’s that in front of you?” 

It was a hammer. 

She said “well don’t just look at it, pick it up. I’ve got stuff to do today don’t waste my time”. 

Then she pointed at the item next to it and said: “What’s that?” 

It was a really big wooden boat. There was a figurine of a man with a long white beard in front of it. 

I said “I don’t know? A boat?” 

She replied: “That’s Noah’s ark, can’t you see the man with the long white beard standing right in front of it?” 

I said: “Oh, yeah” and nodded. 

Then she said: “Now smash it”. 

I replied: “What? No, I’m not smashing Noah’s Ark. Wouldn’t that be blasphemy or something?” 

And she replied: “Oh my God, he’s a moron. He's really a moron. Gimme the hammer” 

She rushed over to me angrily and grabbed it, then proceeded to smash the ark to pieces like a deranged person. I was a little bit scared. She went back to her seat. I didn’t know what to think. I looked at Noah. Noah was still standing but his head had been chopped off, everything else was in shambles. 

She spoke angrily: “The secret to success is breaking all the rules. Find out what the rules are, and then break them, that’s how you get ahead - BE DIFFERENT, DEFY GRAVITY.” 

I protested: “Wouldn’t that be illegal?” 

She said: “Illegal?!” 

She chuckled and replied: “Oh my God, you really are a moron aren’t you? I didn’t say break the law I said the rules”. She sighed again and then paused, as if to think for a second about whether she was wasting her time with me - as if I couldn’t be fixed. Then she looked at me as if she had given up, and said: “Get out”. I felt so hurt, like a total idiot; and a little tear came into the corner of my eye as I stood up to leave with my head down. She called me back, she said: “Wait”. I turned around, and she buried my head in-between her err… em … her … em … chesticles (that’s her breasts), for the second time. I was ecstatic! It totally cheered me up and made me feel like there was hope for me in the music industry. I vowed, without words, to make her proud. 

By the third month my life had taken another turn. I woke up one day and got ready for work only to realise I hadn’t got a penny to my name. All my credit cards were maxed out and my bank account was empty. I didn’t have any money on my Oyster card either. I was still on probation so I had no choice but to call my boss and tell her I wasn’t going to be able to make it to work. I was so embarrassed but I picked up the phone anyway and called, and she picked up immediately. 

She said: “Yuk, what are you doing on my phone?” 

Just as I was about to start talking she quickly caught me off and said: “Look outside your window”. 

I looked outside. It was her, she was parked outside my house. She was in a black Mercedes Benz G Wagon. 

She said: “Hurry up boy, I can’t be seen in this disgusting neighbourhood”. 

I ran down to the car and got in. I greeted her “good morning”. 

She responded as she drove off without looking at me: “What's good about your morning? You suck - I'd bet it sucks”. She was right. There was total silence. 

She drove really fast, almost like a crazy person, her eyes fixed fiercely on the road as if she was looking for something, or someone. There was a really shiny hair brush on the dashboard just in front of me. The hairs on it looked really thick and weird, and curled up. I tried to look away but I couldn’t stop looking at it. I also noticed that it still had the price tag on, even though it had clearly been used many times. When I looked a little closer at the tag I noticed it was priced in dollars, not British Pounds Sterling. I looked a little more closely to see how much it was. It was $8,000,000. I didn’t believe my eyes so I moved my head forward slightly and squinted. I was right, it literally cost $8,000,000. 

She noticed me looking and said: “You like my brush?” 

I said: “Yeah, it’s really shiny”. 

She said: “Take it”. 

I grabbed it immediately to look at the price tag even closer and yelled: “This brush cost 8 million?” 

She replied: “No, it’s WORTH 8 million – it’s for my squish mitten (that’s her vagina)” 

I cringed, I didn’t need to know that. I put it back on the dashboard really slowly; disgusted and confused.  

We didn’t talk for the rest of the ride. 

She stopped the car suddenly a few blocks away from the office and said: “Get out and walk, I can’t be seen with you”. 

I got out. She sped off. 

By this time, she had secretly implanted 3 very vivid images in my mind that made me aware of very specific words every time I recalled them – the jar of milk and the calendar (love), Noah and the hammer (success), the hair brush and the price tag (self worth). She went on to plant 7 more, one every month. Each time she led or finished with something really arousing, sex related or extremely bizarre. Let's talk about them in my next article. 

This article is titled "Euphoria" (look at the top of the browser window and you'll see. If you're on a mobile device then minimize or cascade the window and you'll see it). I'll call the follow up to this article "Euphoria Part II" to make it easier for you to find. I'll also make sure it follows this article in series so you can never miss it. Oh, and by the way it’s me “The Imagination Guy”. I’m sure you’ve heard of me. Good things I hope.

Okay let's do the music review of the day. You're gonna love it. 

The song we are going to review is by an artist who needs no introduction. 20 million records sold, a Soul Train Music Award, 2 BillBoard Music Awards and 4 BillBoard Top 10 Hits; but most importantly, a signature vocal performance style that has NEVER been emulated or duplicated since it was created just over 20 years ago. Chingy’s new single “Nu Beginnings” was released to critical acclaim on the 19th of April and is available to stream and download on Spotify, YouTube, Apple Music, Tidal and all popular digital music streaming and download platforms. 

The track is sensational, I was hooked from the first note. I’m a sucker for flutes, but an even bigger sucker for sonic textures. It’s got the best of everything a discerning hip hop fan would demand from a rap record. Unlike many of today’s hip hop releases, it sounds like it took a lot of time to produce and it sounds very artistic. The lyrics, the flows, the bounce, the overall vibe, the ambiance – all feel like they were meticulously crafted and then perfected over and over till the masterpiece revealed itself. It’s got a very urgent and relentless feel-good vibe about it. It seizes all of your attention and holds it tight until your mind explodes in ecstasy, plunging you into a deep state of euphoria so pleasant you’ll think Jesus is cumming. I literally had to pause for a second to catch my breath half way through the track. I haven’t done that for a very long time - what a rush. 

This is BIG. This is HUGE. This is MASSIVE. This deserves the Number 1 spot on the BillBoard charts and should even win a Grammy. Let’s make it happen, the power is in your hands – yes, YOU. Start by adding it to all your top hip hop playlists and then share it with all your friends. Let’s go!

Explicit.